Perils of a working mom

On my way to work this morning I received a phone call from my husband. It was 7:05 am. "We're a bit cranky this morning, I want to try something."

On the line comes a sweet, tired, tiny, "hello" from Sophia. I tried asking questions-how she slept, if she'd seen Hat (our Elf on the Shelf), if she was going to be good for Papa. She responded with small "yeses" and told me she loved me - "Wuv you too mama."

Great. Phillip came back on the line and I asked "Did she ask for me this morning?" Yes. This was after a night in which we went to sleep in my bed, Phillip tried to move her, she insisted on getting back into bed with me, Phillip was going to sleep on the couch, I convinced her to sleep in her bed with my pillow. And, because I'm on overnight duty in the dorm I won't see her until tomorrow and be gone again tomorrow night.

I was then in tears. I'm sure that's not the outcome Phillip had hoped for. One of us may have felt comforted, but the other feels a heartache greater than you can imagine.

How much income can we live on? Is there another way to manage the joys and sorrows of being a working mother? All I wanted to do was turn the car around and go home to my sweet baby girl. I'm pretty sure she misses me as much as I miss her during the day.

Father Daughter Day

For a little extra moolah I'm working in the dorm of the school that I work at 9-5. It's a pretty easy gig (minus a pregnant mother of a toddler having to stay up until MIDNIGHT) and I only have to do it five times a year. Truth be told, it's a nice break from the regular commute, commute, commute routine. I don't like being away from Sophie and Phillip and it's really hard on Friday's because I don't get to see Sophie for even one minute.

What I really like about it is that it provides a lot of time for Phillip and Sophie to have good quality Papa/Sophie time. He does it all from meals, bath time, tantrums, errands, and of course, lots of fun.

Today they headed out to a historical miniatures show. Sounds boring to me but for Phillip and Sophie it meant model trains and planes, toy soldiers, tanks and so much more. She could hardly wait to see the choo-choos! I talked to them shortly before they were heading home and Sophie was painting a horse. You could over hear her in the background as Phillip and I spoke "ut oh, Sophie paint Papa." So cute. She came home with a mounted horse painted pink, purple, green and blue and green arm on the back of her arm to match.

They have such a good time riding in "Papa's Big ol' truck" and going places together. A little while ago while we were saying our good nights he told me just how much he loves having a daughter and loves having a two year old daughter! She is so cute but also curious and skeptical and finds wonder in so many things. I'm so glad he gets such good quality time with her without me to interrupt that magic.

A good babysitter is hard to come by

Since my husband works in a high school we have a handful of babysitters at our disposal. During the summer while he facilitates several weeks of summer camp we opt to take Sophie out of her regular daycare and keep her at home with a sitter. We usually have a handful of young women who know Sophie, have babysat her before, and are looking for steady summer work. This year I think we have hit the jackpot!

Sophie's new sitter has babysat for us one other time. She came early, wrote down everything they did and ate over the two or three hours we were gone. Phillip and I were impressed. The only flub was that she put Sophie's diaper on backwards. An interesting feat on a kid that weights 32lbs. and squirms during diaper changes.

Sunday we invited her over to the house to review the weekly routine, eating, napping, playtime, diapering. I prepared a daily routine info sheet and emergency contacts for her just in case.

She arrived 20 minutes early. When I returned home she presented me with a detailed list of everything they did that day complete with times-breakfast, riding the tricycle, books, clean up time, nap, snacks, Elmo. I went to Sophie's room to change her diaper and was caught off guard when the door was shut. I walked in and was shocked. I asked if Phillip had cleaned Sophie's room before he left for work. He denied it. Our babysitter cleaned Sophie's room. Her room is the one space I don't mind being a bit out of sorts because it is where all her toys are. Her room hasn't been this clean since before she was born!


She brought us homemade chocolate chip cookies. There were no dirty dishes to wash and no clean dishes to put away. No wonder people have nannies!

Nana Time

During the first weekend of February my husband and I packed up the car complete with dog and baby and headed south. We had reservations at Butterfly Gap Retreat in Maryville, TN. This getaway was as much for me as it was a 30th birthday present for him. We were originally scheduled to head there in December prior to Christmas but had to postpone due to the 18 inches of snow that fell the day we were supposed to leave. The staff at BGR was excellent and so understanding and simply allowed us to book a different date which was easy since the first week of February was ski week at Phillip's school.

I was nervous we would have to postpone again or outright cancel when we woke up to 6 beautiful inches snow! Phillip got right to work shoveling the driveway so we could escape.

This trip also marked the first time we would leave Sophia alone for more than a few hours. We have both spent a few nights away from home in the past two years but never have both of us been away from her at the same time. All was easy going until we put her down for her nap. I'm sure she could sense something was different about this nap time as we both gave her extra squishes and kisses. I will be the first to admit that it wasn't easy leaving her but our trip was needed and deserved. I knew she was in good hands with Nana and would fare just fine.

There days were filled with watching Sesame Street on tv (a luxury since we don't subscribe to cable service) watching the horses in the neighbor's pasture and at Nana's own barn, feeding Nana's horse, and flipping through the many horse related magazines within arms reach. Sophie indulged in being rocked to sleep
and I'm sure some sweet treats that only Sophie and Nana know about.

Nana reported that she only asked for us a few times and went down for her naps and bedtime flawlessly. She didn't use her binkies except for when it was time to sleep and didn't throw any fits. Of course when we returned home and Sophie wanted to eat a snack every five minutes and I wouldn't let her Nana responded "we didn't do that when you were gone" or when I tried to rock Sophie to sleep and she insisted that she giggle and play with my face Nana again responded "we didn't do that..." The power and magic of a grandmother.

It was great to get away and I think in the end it did everyone good.